Matchmaking and Arranged Marriages: A Continuing Tradition
China is transitioning towards becoming a more modern, stable, globalized society; however, long-held cultural values and expectations still play a prominent role. Young adults face immense pressure from society to marry and start families quickly.
As part of dating a Chinese person, it’s essential to keep their culture in mind. This article explores how ancient traditions and modern influences intersect in dating relationships within Chinese culture.
Materialism
Chinese dating culture is an intoxicating mix of ancient traditions and modern influences. While certain Chinese dating practices may be more important than others, understanding their subtle distinctions is vital in order to make the best choices for your relationship. This guide will detail all aspects of Chinese dating including ancient customs and family expectations that could impede an impending romance.
Whereas it may be commonplace for Western women to pursue intimate relationships before marriage, in China this is not always the case. Many young Chinese women may prioritize career development before marriage and don’t take sexual behavior too seriously when dating; something to keep in mind if you plan on marrying a Chinese lady.
China is a collectivist society, meaning that its priorities prioritize collective over individual needs. This is especially evident within families. Because of this, young people in China are encouraged to view marriage and romantic relationships as fulfilling their societal responsibilities; romantic love or other romantic ideals tend to be seen as unimportant by most Chinese people, creating challenges between couples with disparate values.
Studies have revealed that Chinese youth of younger generations are beginning to adopt more individualistic attitudes when it comes to dating and relationships, with peer influences overshadowing parental influence when it comes to dating and courtship behaviors. This could be linked to China’s rapid societal changes or could indicate old traditions are gradually being left behind.
One of the primary differences in modern Chinese dating culture has been an increasing emphasis on materialism. Young Chinese individuals are using dating relationships and courtship relationships as a way to attain status within their social circles; men may “pursue” girls in hopes of winning them over by flaunting their wealth and material possessions; similarly, women compete among themselves to attract the attention of male peers which often results in jealousy and tension within relationships.
Filial Obligation
Chinese culture gives filial piety an important place in dating and relationships. This concept revolves around respecting one’s parents and elders while emphasizing family history ties, such as meeting both parties’ parents before initiating any intimate relations, as well as continuing to show reverence for one’s ancestors as one ages – in stark contrast to Western societies where filial piety may not be so prominently featured.
Filial Piety may vary according to cultural context, yet recent research indicates it as an overarching human motivation with cross-cultural application. Furthermore, recent trends in research have linked it with psychological constructs like love and attachment styles (Norenzayan et al. 2015).
Filial piety can also be seen in how people interact with elderly relatives. While traditional Chinese filial piety emphasizes upholding family lineage, modern trends lean more towards emphasizing personal choice and emotional connections – evidenced by matchmaking apps and platforms which enable individuals to explore romantic possibilities without including family.
Even after these changes, familial approval remains central in Chinese dating culture. Family members frequently assist in matchmaking processes by offering advice about social and economic compatibility or even astrological compatibility for potential matches – this method of finding potential partners known as “men dang hu dui,” places greater emphasis on finding someone from similar backgrounds than on finding just an attractive personality match.
Filial piety encompasses caring for our aging parents – financially supporting, attending to medical needs and assisting in caring for any family members who become ill – this has traditionally been considered the responsibility of sons and daughters.
But there are increasing worries that China is losing its traditions of caregiving for elderly relatives. Birth rates had their lowest point since 1961’s Great Famine; many families are choosing nursing homes as an easier solution due to financial pressures or ignorance regarding long-term care needs.
Marriage at a Young Age
Chinese society continues to observe many traditional beliefs and values despite its advancement as an industrialized nation. One such practice involves couples going through premarital health checks before getting legally married in order to ensure both individuals’ physical well-being and detect genetic disorders that could impact offspring.
Young Chinese adults tend to date within their social circles and may be less inclined to consider partners who don’t share their religion or ethnic background, in part due to having been raised in environments with strong traditional cultural norms dictating gender roles and expectations.
Even as China becomes more exposed to Western culture, young Chinese generations remain unlikely to abandon long-held expectations regarding dating and mate selection. Filial obligation remains a tangible value that connects Chinese youths to their parents (Chui and Hong 2006).
Note that although Chinese dating culture has become increasingly liberal with regard to casual dating, most changes occur mainly within urban regions while traditional norms and protocols still hold firm in rural regions.
Chinese couples typically express interest and request to become each other’s girlfriend/boyfriend shortly after meeting each other, in contrast to other cultures which require a period of dating to get to know one another before proceeding with any relationship.
Notable are also Chinese couples’ habit of dressing alike when going out, which stands in stark contrast with many other cultures. Furthermore, reciprocity is highly prized within Chinese culture and friends often pay for one another when going out together.
Communication
Dating in China may differ significantly from dating in other countries. While Americans typically go through an initial “dating” phase to get acquainted, Chinese individuals usually move directly into formal relationships as soon as they express their interest china brides and their partner reciprocates their liking. Communication plays an integral part of relationships; being mindful of cultural taboos such as politics, religion and personal income should also be kept to a minimum when beginning new relationships.
Notably, younger Chinese men and women tend toward more traditional gender roles as a result of historical, cultural, and societal factors; this should not be taken as being applicable to every single person within China.
As one example, young women from Beijing and Lanzhou may hold differing opinions of family. Although most dating practices within China tend to follow similar protocols, it’s always beneficial to take note of your date’s culture when dating them.
Communication-wise, it’s often best to show patience and understanding. Expressing feelings to someone who hasn’t experienced what you have can sometimes be challenging; similarly being aware of your date’s comfort level regarding physical touch is essential; showing respect for their boundaries will go a long way toward making them feel welcome and respected.
Keep in mind that many Chinese people may be less attuned to Western culture, which should not be taken as criticism but as an indicator of Chinese society being much more deeply rooted in tradition and history than many other cultures in the world. Being respectful of this can help form the basis of your relationship – however this doesn’t imply they won’t welcome new ideas and approaches!
